For my fellow man: a dedication

Last month my friend John, his brain ravaged with cancer, exhorted me to write and publish the things we've talked about..."for my fellow man".

It was powerful to hear this from John, who frequently can't retain or completely express his thoughts. Up until last year John was a successful real estate developer. He is one of several friends I have learned so much from as I have slowly openned myself up to close male relationships. I stand on his shoulders and others, as a man finally growing up (in my 50's!). I feel more energy in my life today as a result of leaning on these guys, learning to listen, to share, and to open myself to real relationships.

For some time now I've felt called to share the joy close male relationships with a larger circle. John and I, along with a few friends have shared some exciting journeys over the past couple years. John's exhortation to me was a reminder of a calling I've shared with him over the past couple years to write about that journey. The things he and I have spoken about might benefit "our fellow man” through the written word.

So I started writing, perched in the guest room of my friend Horace. I'd been fired from my job a month earlier, was on the verge of divorce from my wife of 28 years, and had moved out. I've been feeling confused and asking God to help make sense of it all. Maybe writing will help.

My aspiration is to share a story that some may actually be interested in reading. Not a mushy feelings girly story (OK there may be some of that), but an adventure story of a man’s battles.

When John challenged me to write “for my fellow man”, I knew who he meant.

My Fellow Man
 You are Mark who joined our renewal group several months ago. Linking arms with Gary and me in loving John through his disease. Meeting weekly to go out for lunch, and then when lunch got to be too difficult for our friend, shifting to a late afternoon hiatus when John's energy was strongest. Mark you have lifted me up with your stronger faith, and have encouraged me to share my trials through your curiosity about my broken marriage.
 You are Gary who taught me to be the boy scout I never was. Gary you stepped up to be a true brother to me.
 You are David, the brother with whom I grew up so unsteadily. Our parents didn't draw limits for you or protect me. My only blood brother in whom I see reflections of myself that I love and that I wish to transcend.
 You are Horace, whose guest room I so gratefully occupied when my wife and I separated…again. Horace your devotion to your wife and kids (normal and disabled) led you ahead of me down the path of awakening, separation, elevation, then peace.

John, David, Gary, and Mark - my story is your story. My prayer is that my story is helpful to you.